My dearest, darlingest, most beloved fellow Stargazers to whom I have no earthly attachments,

Okay, so the other Garou weren’t friendly. First, Cana (a Ragabash who has a totally awesome name that kind of reminds me of another awesome name I’ve heard before) started looking really ill. She was pale and dizzy, and then her left side went numb and holy crap I knew what this was it was a heart attack! I tried to help her but she got mad. I think she was just in a panic and took it out on us. At first we were trying to find a way to help her with physical treatment, but soon realized it was the other Garou causing this.

We tried crossing over into the umbra, but Sina, the Galliard, got stuck halfway. She looked all weird and transparenty, and we could see her organs and everything! I was about to try to help her, but suddenly realized that we could see the other Garou now that we were in the umbra, and one of them had his arm reached into Cana’s chest! I am ashamed to say that I just felt all my inner rage boil up at that sight. I couldn’t let them hurt my friends. And I know if I didn’t consider them friends, I wouldn’t have such an attachment that would cause me to lose control of my rage but… but I couldn’t help it! And becoming so enraged helped me save them, so if getting out of balance is what can save lives, the lives of my friends, then I am okay with that.

I shifted into what felt the most powerful to me instinctively, into Crinos, then ran as quick as I could to stop the wolf attacking Cana. I didn’t hold back at all… I reached right for his own heart and tore him in half. But as I did this, I realized he felt not entirely physical. These Garou were spirits of the dead, and I could sense just… a thankfulness as I destroyed it. Like I was letting it free. That feeling was enough to calm me down just slightly, where now I wasn’t killing them out of anger (as long as they didn’t hurt my friends again), but out of necessity and charity. I still felt my body moving instinctively and with vicious intent to kill though, so I wasn’t completely under control…

Next I was attacked by a second Garou, who was just dripping wet and drooling everywhere, but I managed to leapfrog over him (I think I felt a wet splatter from him as I did), more concerned about checking the status of my friends first. Calliope and Sina were being attacked by a spirit who was on fire (and he is so not cool enough to be Mr. Fahrenheit), so I tackled and pinned him with my claws. Feeling the spirity flesh underneath me, thinking about how he almost hurt more of my friends, I had another moment where the rage overtook, treating my claws like picks and just stabbing him over and over again until he dissolved into snowy dust, which I clawed at some more. Once I realized he was completely gone, I looked up and saw that Calliope had managed to get Sina to our side, so they were safe now.

I hopped up, prepared for more battle, but looked just in time to see Valentine fighting a long-armed Garou and BEEEEEES! Actually I think they were wasps, but she managed to stop the spirit and the bees/wasps/hornets/whatever disappeared with it. Seeing she was safe, I turned my attention back to the drooly ghost, but Sina and Cana were taking care of him. Relieved that we had stopped them and everyone was safe, we went back to the physical world. I started to apologize for how out of control I had gotten, but Calliope suddenly came up and hugged me and thanked me for saving her life, and suddenly I just felt better and knew that it was worth losing control if it saved my pack mates.

As we all calmed down and got our bearings back, I realized I had destroyed my clothing when I’d turned Crinos, so now I couldn’t be Homid at all or I’d freeze. And I had bought that coat as my first souvenir of New York! Cana said she’d find me another one though so I guess that’s okay. Then, even crazier, Valentine didn’t know who she was! I thought she had amnesia, but she said her name was Irene and she was freaked out that we were all werewolves! Then, another bombshell, Cana told us we were really on a reality TV show! I started to panic, thinking I had killed innocent ghost actors, but Calliope said that wasn’t true, that Cana was just joking. I hope that’s the case but I’m still gonna be wary for hidden cameras…

Suddenly though we were called from afar. An old man hailed us and said he wanted to give us a meal and a place to rest. He was really nice and could understand us when we were shifted, plus didn’t freak out seeing some of us in Crinos, so we decided to trust him and go with him. He gave us pelts and a delicious meal with meat and all kinds of stuff, and gave me some new clothes too! I turned Homid again and ate by the fire. I think the others were trying to find out more about him while Valentirene and I chowed down. I did get that his name was Bill and that he was very nice. He also told us a story that I didn’t listen to and made us promise to finish our Rite of Passage, which we very much agreed to. He let us sleep in his cabin for the night, and gave us a cool horn or something I think and supplies as a parting gift. He told us not to tell anyone about him, which I guess I’m doing now so oh crap good thing this is a mental journal I will edit this part out before I put it on paper.

So anyway, with that we were on our way, on a journey to complete our Rite of Passage and get out of Canada. However, we were soon interrupted when we entered a cave; it turns out we had been herded in there by some of the Wendigo from earlier. One of them had even spit at Valentine before! I think they wanted to end us in the first place instead of letting us leave… well, I guess I’ll tell you guys more next time in my mental journal!

Signed,
Your dearest, darlingest, most beloved Cainy-Wainy to whom you have no earthly attachment